The new blog is Resilient Stepmom. You can click on the photo to be redirected to it.
While Justin and I begin to embark on this new journey, I will not continue to post on this blog. There’s a lot of darkness on her and I need to start over again. I have to start this journey with a different mind frame. I will keep the blog open but I will not post on there. I will end the blog with my new blog link. There’s still healing to be done in our family but it’s time for a new book to open. Thank to all the ones who have showed their support to our family through these nightmare of years. We cannot thank you enough. I posted this on SSAC2010 on Facebook but I’ll post it here too.
We have a little bit of celebrating to do. Yesterday, November 1st 2014 was the day SB1612 went into effect. My husband and I started to sit back funds in 2010 for this battle that we are about to embark on. For many years the Biomom has been an emotional terrorist towards her child. Due to the Biomom being the way she is along with the courts help, my family was torn apart. Most of you know our journey. We couldn’t keep fighting. We were in so much debt and the courts being corrupt didn’t help with our battle either. We had to regroup and figure out the next action plan. This whole year has been leading up to November 1st. This was the year we would try to fight for our family again. As we embark on this journey I’m so thankful for this page. All 4,827 of you have been helpful to us. As I keep raising awareness and begin our journey again to fight for our family, I ask that you send us all the good vibes you can send. We will start to file this week. I swore to myself that 2014 will be the year that starts to change the bad into good. Even though this journey has been a nightmare something good will come of this. Thank you all once again for your support. ~Much love from Momma Bekah.
I’ve really had nothing good to say lately. I’ve kept my mouth shut for a little bit. Today I go on Pinterest and look around for quotes. A lot of them stuck out to me. I want to share them with you too. I won’t apologize for not posting all that much. It’s what I do. I’ll post a few things for a while and stop. Is it because I’m tired of this page? No, it’s because I can’t dwell on this negative stuff. I can’t repair everything that someone else broke. I can try but I ran myself crazy trying to fix everything. This morning on Pinterest I found so many quotes that just stood out to me. Here are the ones that stuck out to me.
I found this on Heart Thyself LLC. on Facebook. It’s a great page and if your dealing with a hostile Biomom this site might be helpful to you. I really liked this post that I have posted in bold typing. I hope this helps someone out there.
Hey “Moms” there’s an episode of Judge Judy on.. The lady withheld visitation from the father because she thought that’s just how it should be. Judge Judy doesn’t like that… Honestly is doesn’t take all that much brain power to figure out that it’s best to have BOTH loving, caring, and supportive parents in the child’s life, but thanks to “moms” like you who think the child is property these children will never know what it’s like to have both parents in their life. This is because of you being selfish enough not to be a real mother. You are too obsessed with your anger towards the father of the child. Get a clue that you are hurting your child more instead of your ex. Just a thought! Have a great day.
Some words of wisdom on the subject of lying by writers, philosophers and other other notable people.
“I’m not upset that you lied to me, I’m upset that from now on I can’t believe you.”
― Friedrich Nietzsche
“Just because something isn’t a lie does not mean that it isn’t deceptive. A liar knows that he is a liar, but one who speaks mere portions of truth in order to deceive is a craftsman of destruction.”
― Criss Jami
“When truth is replaced by silence,the silence is a lie.”
― Yevgeny Yevtushenko
So after Senate Bill 1612 (to enforce visitation in Oklahoma without a lawyer filing for you) I want to come up with a bill for false allegations of abuse in family court. My thoughts are ….One must provide evidence such as CPS reports, police reports, photos if there’s bruising, a doctors visit, and maybe some other reports. The “expert witness” may not be someone who was previously used in another case. These are the issues that we ran into during 2008 to 2009. Just from lies from the Biomom the judge sided with her. Without any proof what so ever I was treated as a child abuser. You can even get a “therapist” that the other parent is unaware of and they can testify against you. Where the heck did the justice system go to?? I ask myself so many questions. The only thing I can come up with is that the legal system is a joke for some families. Children are mentally abused and manipulated by one parent in order to hurt the other parent. What about the kids?? How are they handling this?? This has to stop. Allegations of abuse must demand to have more proof in order to treat the “abuser” as an abuser. You can’t treat someone badly just because someone is a good liar and a good manipulator. You need to have proof and that’s not how it goes in Shawnee Oklahoma with Judge Gardner. Bills need to be created but then again there’s laws and the judge will not hold the Biomom accountable for anything. But if this was my husband doing what the Biomom is doing he would be in jail. It shouldn’t matter what gender you are. The law is the law and it needs to be upheld by the judges. * Next Senate Bill rant done*
Never in a million years would I thought the lady who I’m about to take a birthday shot with along with our husbands, laughed about what her daughter did that day in school, talked about her wedding dress and mine so we wouldn’t have matching dresses. The lady who sent me a sympathy card for my grandfathers death, congratulated me on my marriage, and the lady who acted fine towards me for months would later accuse me of child abuse. Never in a million years did I see this one coming. Boy was I was naive! Or maybe the reason was that I’m a Stepmom who was so excited that we all got along for the child’s sake. I wonder how long it took her to plan this game. I just wish she would leave her child out of it. What a manipulating game this is.
II have at least two emails a day about other Stepmoms being falsely accused of abuse. These are my views from what I’ve been through as a Stepmom being falsely accused of child abuse.
Have you been falsely accused of child abuse? Are you a Stepmom or soon to be an official Stepmom?? Just know that you’re not alone. There are so many Biomoms who use this as a way to remove you from their child’s life. For some reason they hate you and they will reach for anything they can in order for you to look like the bad person even if that means lying. In their eyes they are the “hero” and you are nothing but a waste of space. They will lie like a pro because they have to sound like the ” better parent”. So hold on tight and learn that they are miserable so they have to try to make your life miserable too. Just a little inside thought from Momma Bekah.
I love my second class this semester in college. I’m learning a lot on how to deal with difficult people. It comes in handy after dealing with a woman who could careless about her child’s rights. Sometimes I have to take a step back and try to see it from their side. In this situation I cannot for the life of me figure out why the Biomom uses her child to hurt us. A while ago I made the choice to stop trying to figure it out and stop trying to figure out the Biomom. You will drive yourself crazy if you spend all of your time trying to figure out someone who is manipulative, who is a liar, and someone who is selfish enough to remove their own child’s rights. You have to learn how to deal with this type of situations in your own way. Sometimes you have to stop in the middle and make sure that you’re doing what is best and keep in mind that you have morals. Stick with the truth, stick with your morals, and stand up for what is right even though it might be the toughest thing you have to do.